End of the Pier

2007-05-07T17:35:00.000+01:00

As an addendum to the below, went out for drinks last Friday with old work colleague who I haven't seen since that night, we frequented the same hostelries, and what do you know, ran into same old school-friend again. And beer is evil, again.And now, fun for all the family, a discourse on office gender politics...Now I've worked in a lot of different places, from public sector offices to

2007-02-17T15:58:00.000Z

Beer is evil. Went out for drinks after work to celebrate my last day at work. Drank a fair amount of beer, then moved to a different pub where I ran into an old schoolfriend. Spent a long time arguing about films with him (which is how we spent the entirety of our sixth form free periods) and then fell off of a stool. Claaaasssy. Stopped drinking beer, but then it somehow got to 1am (I'd

2007-01-28T15:07:00.000Z

So I should really get back to this writing thing. I've been recently forcing myself to paint again, and it's rewarding to see that I can still bodge away quite merrily and get a reasonable result.I've been temping for local government for the past 4 months, otherwise known as the second longest temp job that I have held. Despite being quite low-paid, I have stuck around, I think, because I'm a

2006-05-01T17:24:00.000+01:00

So, thanks to the hands of fate, I'm in possession of a Sky+ box, complete with all premium channels. So what have I been watching? Some classic American films? Classic British kitchen sink drama? Uh, no.Mostly I can't stop watching celebrities playing poker. The TV poker thing is fairly hypnotic in itself, but stick in a Malcolm Jamal-Warner or a Lacey Chabert and I'm just stuck there. For

2006-02-12T15:13:00.000Z

Sooo, Arrested Development. I’ve just had two months of intensive watching of seasons 1-3, in that rare heady ‘OMG I love this show’ onslaught kind of way.Stage 1 (late 2003): I read on ye olde forums of the Fametracker that there is a new show called Arrested Development and it be the good. I assume that it’s still a regular kind of sitcom, but well enough recommended by people with similar

2005-07-29T23:18:00.000+01:00

I found out today that I’m not cut out to be a Top Gear presenter. I can’t exactly say that it came as a shock to me, despite once been in enough proximity to Richard Hammond in order to compare heights. Sorry Richard for being that loon shuffling towards you on a train at Waterloo. I just can’t drive other cars, i.e. other cars that are even vaguely fancy. I got used to my brother’s Audi A4

2005-06-29T21:20:00.000+01:00

See, someone from the DangerousInterweb lent me the box-set of Firefly. Despite my usually quick descent into soporifia at the first sign of a slidey-spaceship-door (sci-fi ain’t my bag), somehow I fell head-over-heels in love with this thing. I’m having slight trouble justifying it to myself, because I know that it isn’t exactly Six Feet Under/Sopranos goodness, but dammit if I couldn’t watch

2005-06-04T15:16:00.000+01:00

I CAN BUY WINE WITH MY NEWLY WON LUNCHEON VOUCHERS!It's the deal you do with the devil. Go permanent on crappy office job and get free* alcohol. I'm an easy sell.Other benefits? Glamorous day trips to sunny somewhat rainy Doncaster. It's the high life of business travel, I tell ya.*Apart from having paid tax on it. Grr.

2005-05-29T19:38:00.000+01:00

Heh. And that's why I hate phoning people. Sodding people giving their phone to their mum! And I thought that was the new number. Ah well.

2005-05-29T19:34:00.000+01:00

I’m really not good on the phone. Well, not for those first few seconds. For work stuff, I avoid it whenever possible, but when I’m in the position of chasing a certain temp agency for the holiday pay that they owe me, I’m fine... (Payroll bint: "If you’ve got your P45 then it’s a bit difficult." (then put on hold) "*Sigh*. We’ll have to do you a new one."; Me: "Well, yes, that’s what you’re

2005-05-21T00:20:00.000+01:00

Man, that’s the closest I’ve ever got to calling 999. I went out on my balcony to listen to the group of men arguing over their lines of cocaine in the grounds of the church 5 metres away from me in case there was any intimation of an actual escalation into violence. ‘Cos they weren’t half threatening it. I live in quite a nice area. A nice enough area that I’ve accidentally left my car

2005-05-09T22:02:00.000+01:00

Thanks to a very stupidly generous emigrating brother et famille, I am now the owner of a seriously incongruous widescreen TV, Pioneer surround sound system, and a second DVD player (which remembers where it’s been stopped and doesn’t automatically whack on the subtitles, so it’s a step up from my other one). I’m still overcome with the sense of wonder that makes me play the beginning of Charlie

2005-04-12T18:00:00.000+01:00

Most annoying thing? I was trying to get home in time to see Ben Miller being sleazy in that ITV period murder thing, and obviously completely failed. Ah well.I might, just very possibly, have ordered Honey on DVD to cheer myself up. Maybe. Because I really wouldn't do a thing like that, right?

2005-04-11T20:32:00.000+01:00

Yesterday I broke down on the M4. In very slow moving traffic. And very narrowly missed crashing with a breakdown vehicle steaming along the hard shoulder when I pulled over. Oh, and... I, uh, meant to sign up to the RAC on Saturday and I forgot. So no breakdown cover. Nice one.So, yeah. Caught up in the usual Sunday evening east-bound traffic on the M4 which had slowed to a crawl after an

2005-04-03T18:50:00.000+01:00

My goodness, Dodgeball SUCKS. Like, sucks more than Starsky & Hutch. Why do I keep doing the Ben Stiller thing to myself? I should know better. Going by the extras, the director has an incredibly inflated idea of his own "sophisticated" humour, and the 'joke' commentary was a 'joke' too far. Especially when my DVD player was unable to let me select the proper commentary easter egg link, so I

2005-03-21T21:12:00.000Z

I found out today that my only fellow temp at work, an absolute sweetheart of a lass, has been told off for working too many hours, the same hours, if not less than, what I do. And she’s a temp-perm, and is just about to turn permanent. I know that the only reason that they’re not saying the same to me is because of my leverage (I work on my own 80% of the time, and despite being a temp, I am

2005-03-05T15:01:00.000Z

I miss Soho. I miss all of central London. Which are possibly the words of a madwoman.Am gradually spreading my Temp Evil Empire at work. Currently have two desks and appear to have kidnapped a ‘phone by accident. Muahaha. Even if I am still having to share a log-in on the dastardly PCs. I have spent the last week staring at Excel sheets (which I am getting very good at putting pretty

2005-01-29T17:01:00.000Z

Can we praise Allan or whoever for my startlingly good ability to visit my sister & family on the very rare occasions that my brother-in-law is cooking Sri Lankan curry. Just so nice. Citrus-y and much more varied that the British-Indian cooking we or I are used to. He and my sister have spent many months extracting just a couple of recipes from his aunt, cos his father managed to teach him

2004-12-30T23:15:00.000Z

Things that don’t agree with me: • Fax machines (which way up am I meant to put the damn page?) • Telephone switchboards • The rediscovery of Wimpy • People drunkenly singing Do They Know It’s Christmas at 12.01am on Christmas Day. The land of irony, she is far away. • Office clothing. I ran out of suitable clothing to wear after working through my teenage going-out wardrobe. Which took

2004-12-30T22:59:00.000Z

See, at the moment, we’re doing “la, la, hold-on-to-sanity” while doing mind-numbing job. It comes to something when you rely on watching a bit of the Chopper director’s commentary every morning just to keep hold of normality. It’s a really good commentary by the way. Until now, I hadn’t realised quite how I cannot stand people who have no idea of what consists of a “good” film, by either

2004-11-09T01:08:00.000Z

Clueless. I had the inclination to watch it for the umpteenth time after seeing Elt-uhhhn in the season finale of Six Feet Under. (I had missed his couple of previous appearances in this season and the entirety of season 3, because past midnight I tend to zone out and need to sleep. Hello, shite Channel 4 schedulers!). Seriously, this is very much in my top five films ever, if not the top two

2004-11-08T19:02:00.000Z

Someone please stop me watching every Strictly Come Dancing programme that exists. It is not healthy. But pretty, pretty sequins! Oh, and I forgot reason 4,322 why temping sucks... Having to use a sodding PC with sodding Word and sodding Outlook and sodding Excel. What's with all the symbols for actions? Are we considered to be so illiterate that we can't read a menu command? Cue lots of

2004-11-05T20:36:00.001Z

As the veteran of one day of it, I can obviously conclude that... Man, temping sucks. Prior to applying for it, and doing it, I thought that I could play the part. Literally. Whack the clothes on like it's a costume, make nice conversation and perform like the professional office person who can shut her mouth and type in office-lingo. But then I found that my hair really won't go into a neat

2004-11-01T17:16:00.000Z

Long time, no blog, but doing 100-hour weeks on low-budget film, then computer explodes into the ether, then possibly getting fucked over by SFX company while working on big studio film, then get a new computer that I can’t afford due to aforementioned fucking-over. *crosses fingers that at least one cheque gets through before bankrupcy/liquidation*. So, you start to appreciate the computer.

2004-07-25T22:27:00.000+01:00

Ngahhh. M25. Why the heck are people going around London on a Sunday afternoon? I can understand them heading into London, *waves at the stationary cars on the east-bound M4 carriageway*, but I’m thinking that the Dartford tunnel is not a common destination for Sunday cruisers. So why was I bumbling along at the warp-speed of 15mph? And oh ye oh-so-clever people who think they can beat the

2004-07-20T00:11:00.000+01:00

Behold the genius of interior designer Laura McCree. If you don't snort at least three times during that biog, then, well, there is no place for you on this earth.

2004-07-19T23:38:00.000+01:00

"We declared war on terror. We declared war on terror—it’s not even a noun, so, good luck. After we defeat it, I’m sure we’ll take on that bastard ennui." I had momentarily parted from the Jon Stewart, but am now back in the fold after reading his Commencement Address to the graduates (graduans?) of his alma mater. Funny and appropriate. "I am honored to be here and to receive this honorary

2004-07-19T23:10:00.000+01:00

It’s 11pm at night. Most people would be surfing for pr0n. I’m surfing for cutlery. Along with everything else household-concerned. I’m in the weird situation of owning 2 crystal champagne flutes and 3 corkscrews but no normal glasses. Also, how is it possible that a Swedish company can sell a plate for 50p but the beer in the Swedish capital costs £3.50? Even considering their 25% tax, I’m

2004-07-07T13:27:00.001+01:00

Am greatly looking forward to tonight's The Long Firm. The cast looks great (apart from possibly the Walford One, that is... I'll reserve judgement), Joe Penhall is adapting, and Mark Strong's presence reminds me of another great BBC 2 drama, Births, Marriages & Deaths. Perfect scheduling, because I can follow it up with what will be my last viewing of America's Next Top Model before I leave

2004-07-07T13:20:00.000+01:00

Life’s equations... People running into things is always funny Unexpectedness factor (see Fairuza Balk in Almost Famous) + running into faux backdrop (see Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back) = possible boundless hilarity Kenickie is far more attractive than Danny Baby’s bottom chin + girl pouty lips + crap bouncy walk is not > Kenickie. There is never a possibility of a director’s commentary

2004-07-02T19:07:00.000+01:00

Ironically, despite having much more time due to unemployed status, I haven’t updated. So, as I sit still chuckling at Billy Ray Cyrus’s “he’s probably upset, Lorraaaayyne,” from Mulholland Drive, here’s some thoughts on London... • Walking across the bridge and seeing the higgledy-piggledy array of architectural styles and eras arranged on both sides of the Thames never fails to make me smile.

2004-04-06T14:18:00.000+01:00

I've just twigged that Grange Hill used to be filmed at Elstree. I probably parked in the spot where DANNY KENDALL DIED! Apologies for the capitalisation, but it was one of those television moments that imprinted itself in my childhood memory. Along with my first recollection of Grange Hill: Imelda in the boiler room with some green stuff, which, thanks to the internet, I know now to be

2004-03-25T15:23:00.000Z

Sorry, this is turning into an Obscure Celebrity Spotting blog... Cue big old kerfuffle below my shop, involving about 15 tourists of various nationalities, waving at the Ben Sherman shop and taking photographs. After sundry attempts at catching the attention of the security guard downstairs, I resort to heckling the group of tourists: Me, from balcony: “Excuse me? Excuse me! Oi, uh, hello.

2004-03-25T15:20:00.000Z

Some tips for the tourists and dense people visiting my shop... Familiarise yourself with the trading laws... A familiar sight at about 11.30 am on a Sunday is various confused-looking people trying to find a shop that is open. Admittedly, we don’t have the square footage for the Sunday Trading Law to apply, but look around you, exactly how many shops have you passed that have been open? Er,

2004-03-03T13:48:00.000Z

Just as I start to get complacent about the safety and innocuousness of Soho during the day, I read this (time sensitive link). Shit. I walked past Archer Street within 10 minutes of that happening. You can treat such establishments as kind of cutesy by the day, but it reminds me why I used to really not like Soho at night. I used to be really uncomfortable in Soho. One too many girls

2004-03-03T13:21:00.000Z

I specialise in celebrity spots of high obscurity, and the other day I outdid myself. Number one, Paterson Joseph of Casualty fame on my train. It is very nice of all the obscure actors who end up on my train to pull out a script, just as I’m trying to work out if I do recognise them from somewhere, thereby saving me the anguish of figuring out if I just know them from the local Sainsbury’s or

2004-02-24T14:32:00.000Z

Saw Paul Nicholls. Again. For, like, the 10th time. STOP STALKING ME AND MY FAMILY! That goes for you too, Duncan-from-Blue. He may be the lone In America actor without an Oscar nomination, but my boy Paddy Considine appears to have a main part in the Russell Crowe/Ron Howard production, Cinderella Man. There was gossip that he turned down the detective part that Benjamin Bratt is playing

2004-02-18T15:59:00.000Z

I am going to batter those charity clipboard people senseless. The ones in Reading haven’t been around very long, so they’re hideously enthusiastic and unused to dealing with the seasoned London worker who has done the clipboard slalom for over 3 years now. Two of them separately ran from the other side of the street to intercept me today. Resulting in an even more forceful “NO, thank you,”

2004-02-08T17:42:00.000Z

I’ve happened across Broadcasting Standards Commission reports during random searches a few times, but this time had a bit more of a thorough read over the last couple of months... All complaints not upheld by the BSC: From the what-exactly-were-they-expecting file: • ER: graphic depiction of injuries. • V Graham Norton: tasteless content. • Real Sex: sexual content • Porn: A Family Business:

2004-02-08T13:41:00.000Z

Quotes from an old bitch of a tutor: When especially pissed off with our crapness: “If I was not contractually obliged to be teaching you, I would be in L.A. working on the design of The Scorpion King”. (Us: Well, go then. I’m sure The Rock would appreciate your talents far more than we do.) “We would have designed the costumes for Gladiator but The Mummy Returns overran.” (Hence my glee when

2004-01-29T17:58:00.000Z

I found Hershey’s Kisses in a bar form at my local shop. Yes, I know the chocolate tastes like shite, but the last time I had Hershey’s Kisses, I had won them off of a New York teacher in a bet over which bloke was going to take his shirt off next in a particularly intense game of basketball. You’ve got to have a skill in life, and that day I found mine. So Hershey’s Kisses are the sweet taste

2004-01-26T12:10:00.000Z

I try to keep the musical geek in me suppressed most of the time, but I was filled with slight glee when I heard the rumour that Evita is going to be revived. It was my prediction for the next musical to be dusted off. Next prediction: Tommy to be picked up by the National and produced small scale to great critical acclaim. Do you reckon Ladbroke’s have got a book on that? And now to fully

2004-01-25T21:00:00.000Z

I admire the new retro choice of music in the Queen Vic, instead of the sound people playing ‘guess the chart hit in 2 months’ time’, but really, if you’re going to stage a tense dramatic stand-off, don’t play Devil Woman under it. Cos it made me snigger so much I have no idea what actually happened. If that was intentional, then I salute you, dear sound people. And, please, for the love of

2004-01-25T20:50:00.000Z

On an ever-so frivolous note... My clothes on the telly: First it was my Kronk t-shirt worn by Zoe Slater, who admittedly looked a whole lot better in it than I do. Spit. Then it was my boots worn by one of Liberty X on Popworld. I’d barely woken up before I saw that atrocity. And she’d tucked her trousers into them. That’s boot abuse, that is. The final straw was my tights (they’re

2004-01-20T13:07:00.000Z

On the twelfth hour of Reading, my town centre gave to meee, 12 drunk 12-year-olds 11 Topshop mini-skirts 10 button-down shirts 9 mini-cabs a-touting 8 whiffs of urine 7 rude boy racers 6 baldy bouncers 5 RIII-OTTTT VANS 4 meatheads rucking 3 comatose vomiters 2 brand new clubs And a mental case on the night bus.... ...(or not as the case may be; he got refused and so threw himself against a

2004-01-12T11:55:00.000Z

I can't believe I forgot my almost favourite hilarious TV moment of all time: • Eeevil Rob traps Ruth, Lewis, Tony and, er, some others in a reservoir tank on Hollyoaks, 2000. The mwah-ha-ha-ha laughing from the control room, the horrendous acting and the frankly ridiculous setting with the actors bobbing about in an overly-theatrically lit tank. “Right, if we use loads of red and green lights

2004-01-06T21:39:00.000Z

Chitty poster update! Unfortunately the grandees at the Palladium have not seen fit to change the pictures outside the theatre to show Jason Donovan in role. Boo! Really. A bit of Photoshop and you'd have been laughing. On the good news side, coming to a bus shelter with random-shoe-on-top near you, posters advertising Donovan's stay as Caractacus Potts! Yay! Sadly, I have only seen these

2004-01-06T20:50:00.000Z

While Ricky Martin’s She Bangs played on the magnificent Reading 107, I found myself shimmying. I haven’t shimmied since 1994. I also found myself doing that Martin-esque head flick thing to the side at salient points in the lyrics, which isn’t too sensible when you’re doing 85 in the outside lane. And then something akin to Move Any Mountain played which had me throwing shapes in the air,

2003-12-30T17:20:00.000Z

Can’t escape your past role... You know the ones. The ones for which you cannot recall their current character name without at least 5 minutes thought. My personal favourites: 1) Crap Gangster Eddie Santini on EastEnders. Dude, he was more evil as a police officer on The Bill. To his credit, he was a reason for the only time that I have been thoroughly hooked on The Bill, but hence will

2003-12-28T22:21:00.000Z

As it seems that the much vaunted Oxford Street ‘Fast Lane For People Who Know Where They’re Going And Are Not Window-Shopping’ has faltered in its establishment, I am now campaigning for the ‘Ticket Barrier Exclusively For People Who Have Used Public Transport Once Before In Their Lives’. Good lord. Number one tip: Turn the ticket the right way round. Number two tip; If the barrier tells

2003-12-28T21:44:00.000Z

Comedy moment no. 1: A bloke trying for five minutes to pull down the nubbly bit dividing the tube seats thinking that it was an armrest. Comedy moment no. 2: Three girls starting to come out of the train toilet before an incredibly fast shove back in as they realised that the ticket inspector was standing right outside, ready to unlock the main doors upon arrival at the station. And then

2003-12-27T17:10:00.000Z

Update on the 200 Santas thing. I had kind of surmised that it must be some kind of flash mob or Circle line party type thing and it is so. And this is the picture I saw them taking. Weird.

2003-12-27T15:33:00.000Z

I'd like to sing a little song, it's called "I tried to run errands on Oxford Street two days before Christmas and got squished." It's a hideous annoyance that my local shops to work happen to be on Oxford St and Regent St. You have never wanted more to maim a daytripper. And can't they have special queues in the bank and in shops for people who are doing work-related things rather than those

2003-12-15T12:22:00.000Z

A life on stage... Unsurprisingly, my career on the stage has been somewhat brief and insignificant. Unsurprisingly because a), I can’t act, and b), I will always get the attack of the giggles. My only lead role was as the female version of the boy in The Snowman while aged 6 or 7. I graduated from that to a pioneer’s daughter called Hannah who had to say a tearful goodbye to her (stuffed)

2003-12-14T20:59:00.000Z

Things learnt this weekend... It is entirely possible to reapply concealer, lipstick, and lipgloss between Stockwell and Vauxhall on the Victoria line. 200 Father Christmases walked through my place of work the other day. Seriously*. That will have confused the young ‘uns. They were quite possibly very drunken Father Christmases, seeing as they provided the sound effects of the biggest stag

2003-12-10T14:44:00.000Z

My entries for Room 101... South West Trains They are evil. Very very evil. They suck away my money for a non-existent service. They’re generally rude, and can’t be arsed to explain any delays apart from offering up the insanely annoying “delayed due to the delay of the inbound service”. That’s not a reason, that’s an effect of the reason. Region Coding Enhanced Mostly because I know

2003-12-08T12:00:00.000Z

Probably soon to be added to when I remember more... • Frank Spencer on rollerskates - Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em, 1973. Mostly because it involves commentary from my parents about the roads in which it takes place. And it starts off at the Ally Pally roller rink. • Alan Partridge does a Kate Bush medley - Comic Relief, 1999. “Rolllllllleeeng the ball. Rolllllleeeng the ball.” • Johnny

2003-12-03T15:37:00.000Z

The joys of the last train home... Monky reminds me. I recently reacquainted myself with the delight that is the 23.33 out of Waterloo. It is a class packed-to-the-gills wagon that leaves at a time enabling you enough minutes to stumble towards Waterloo/Clapham Junction as soon as the last orders bell rings. Now I frequently got this train. In fact, I took up a Friday night residence on this

2003-11-27T14:05:00.000Z

A word to the wise... It is not a good idea to go ahead and henna your hair even after realising that you didn't restock your latex gloves. I am now suffering from a severe case of smoker's nails.

2003-11-20T13:44:00.000Z

This bloke was on my train last week. Couldn't work out where I knew him from, but then caught the name in some credits after happening across him being snogged by Marc Warren in a wig on TV last night. And no, I still don't know where I know him from.

2003-11-12T14:23:00.000Z

The nominations for the British Comedy Awards are out: For Best International Comedy Show: Friends Malcolm In The Middle Will And Grace Now, as far as I'm concerned, the British Comedy Awards usually get it right on this category. And it's always fun to see the filmed acceptance 'speech' from the recipients. Remember David Duchovny helping out with the Larry Sanders one? (The one exception

2003-11-07T12:39:00.000Z

"Bongs for Baghdad"? What does that headline make you think of? Not just me, eh? Well done, The Guardian.

2003-11-06T15:39:00.000Z

Celebrity spotting rules You gotta have a system, people! 1. Spots occurring in direct pursuit of your employment are not allowed (exact rule still under discussion): If you’re a waiter at the Beckhams’ garden party, the spots don’t count. Though you can count yourself if you wander into back of shot of Des Lynam’s interview (well done, Jon). 2. Eyeballing is essential: Which means that

2003-11-06T14:42:00.000Z

152 drivers caught speeding in 3 hours on two roads in Reading. (time-sensitive link) Considering that most of Reading's one-way system is a blinkin' carpark for most of the day, it is hardly surprising that the drivers are so delighted that they are actually moving, and so tend to get carried away with the speed. God knows that I find myself flinging my arms in the air with joy when I can

2003-11-06T14:22:00.000Z

The Ten Commandments of Theatre Workers - Thou shalt smoke. Preferably right next to a ‘no smoking’ sign. And next to all the hemp ropes and wooden floors. - Thou shalt sing. - Thou shalt be able to shout “HEADS UP” in the style of the Big Issue seller outside of the Reading John Lewis. - Thou shalt build sets in the manner of Changing Rooms. ie. they don’t last and have great capacity to

2003-11-06T10:52:00.000Z

Helloo Reading Evening Post and Reading 107, Susanne from Pop Idol? Is not from Reading. And is a bit of a mentalist.

2003-11-05T19:04:00.000Z

What did we learn today, chickabiddies? • Those charity people with clipboards need to be maimed. Soon. Quite possibly by me by swing a half-naked mannequin at them. Me shaking my head in a vociferous manner is not an invitation in indulge in 'witty banter' with me. Cos I'm pissed off, tired, and earning far less than you. So sod off. • 10 metre stretch of Carnaby St with said half-naked

2003-10-28T14:18:00.000Z

The Rules of Attraction (some spoilers) Really, really, didn’t like this. I was prepared to look beyond the Beek, but no, it was so so crap. And I can normally cope with reeeeallly crap films. Two minutes into this film it was obvious that it had been written by a male hand. I’d never seen it to be signposted so clearly. That the rape is depicted in a non-disturbing way is disturbing in

2003-10-26T17:50:00.000Z

I managed to catch Hanson on RI:SE the other morning (shuddup, my tv was left on Channel 4 from the night before). It scared me. And I couldn't stop thinking of Jon Stewart's A Very Hanson Christmas.

2003-10-24T13:32:00.000+01:00

The HMV sale The HMV sale is much like the Old Navy sale. You know you don’t need anything, you know that you have no money to spend, but somehow you are convinced that you are getting the best deal of the century on a DVD that you don’t really want. Quote of the night Den to Drunk!Lisa: "Your shift has just hit the fan." Bravo, Eastenders' scriptwriters. Things learnt from watching

2003-10-21T21:06:00.000+01:00

Today has been Quite Famous TV Presenter spotting day. Oh, and Lewis from Hollyoaks. You can't have everything in life. Jamie Theakston, barrelling along Broadwick St. Paul O'Grady, looking happy, at the top of Carnaby St. Kate Thornton, as I suddenly got a fit of the giggles and so had to avoid looking at her. Derren Brown, not looking mysterious in any shape or form.

2003-10-20T12:53:00.000+01:00

In praise of the cheap Gap: Old Navy We like a shop where a medium is too big on me. Old Navy became the holy grail on our days off from the up-state NY camp where I worked one summer. “But it’s just $10!” “But it’s just $5!” “I could never get this as cheap in Britain. OK, I might never have chosen to buy this in Britain, but hey, it’s FIVE DOLLARS!” My Old Navy pyjama bottoms are the

2003-10-19T13:02:00.000+01:00

On occasion I look after a small clothes shop in London. A typical day of not much work: 9.00am: Try to will stationary bus into action by shooting an evil at the bus driver who has been sitting on his ass for the past 10 minutes doing the crossword. 9.30am: Get to the station and berate all British rail companies for being crap and for frequently lying through their teeth. Berate myself for

2003-10-19T12:17:00.000+01:00

Dude, when getting home very tired after suffering from the actions of the sunny-day-skiver train drivers, it doesn’t half mess with your head to read “Wimbledon moves to Milton Keynes” on Teletext.

2003-10-17T17:30:00.000+01:00

Yay! New blog. Let's try my bodging linking skills:We Want Your Soul.